50 is the new same old 50

I am not a Sex & the City fan. Not a big deal, I’m just not a big TV watcher anyway; I prefer to spend my free time online. I am, however, a Kim Cattrall fan. At least, I’ve become one over the last few years (and even more so today) because I think that she’s an exceptionally fine looking woman. Ms. C turned 50 a couple of years ago, but as far as I’m concerned, she more than holds her own against the younger actresses in S&TC, which is now premiering on the big screen.

Yes, the S&TC movie is out, and is causing a lot of media buzz. And that’s what leads me to today’s little gnashing of teeth.

You know, sometimes we get a little wrapped up in our safe little blogging world, and we forget about some of the things that are going on in the world outside. Here, in Edge-of-Vanilla-land, women are sexy because of their attitudes. Skin color, weight, hair length, and yes, even age are secondary and tertiary considerations; EoV Testing Laboratories rates the sexiness of women bloggers primarily on wittiness, intelligence, writing ability, evinced interest in posting pictures of interesting body parts, and a desire to be GGG (Good, Giving, and Game). Extra points are awarded to those who stroke my ego.

As I spend a lot of my free time reading and blogging, I’m sometimes surprised – and disappointed – when I run across people with attitudes that are much less tolerant than my own. Such was the case today; I came to work with a smile on my face, courtesy of Mrs. Edge who spent part of yesterday afternoon and last night expressing her appreciation for the nice little party that I threw for her 50th birthday. That’s right, I had sex with a 50 year old woman. And I enjoyed it! Yet, from the comments I’ve been reading in the entertainment blogs about Kim Cattrall, you’d think that I was fortunate not to have scraped myself on her dry, dusty, wrinkly vagina. If I could even have gotten hard, that is, once I’d seen the cellulite, crows feet, stretch marks, and other skin imperfections.


What the fuck is wrong with some of these people?

Or maybe I should be asking who the hell are these people who are so young and perfect that they can make such remarks about anyone over the age of 35? Have any of the people commenting – which are both men and women – any idea at all of what’s going to happen to them when they hit 40? 45? 50? 60? Do they expect that their own sex drive is going to shrivel up, wither away?

Maybe they do. After all, by the comments that I’ve been reading, old people – that is, people past their 40s – aren’t supposed to be sexual. Oh, they might eye the younger, hot bodies on the various TV shows, the may linger over an advertisement in a magazine, they might even have some desire. . . but to actually have sex? Out of necessity only, and with the protection of a HEPA dust filter and a can of 90 weight transmission lube.

Kim Cattrall has pretty much made a career out of playing a woman that enjoys sex, one who is older than we expect to have such inclinations. This was a criticism of her a decade ago when S&TC was a new show, and it’s one that will continue to haunt her as long as narrow-minded people with low expectations continue to have opinions on such things.

Lest you think that it’s just a bunch of random malcontents, consider today’s quote from Gawker.com, on a new series in which Kim Cattrall will be starring:

sammelon.pngSex and the City Actress To Continue Having Sex

Sex and the City star and perpetually naked old lady Kim Cattrall will continue her illustrious career of pretend-fucking on camera for HBO. The positively ancient fiftysomething coital acrobat has signed on to play the lead in a new series, copied of course from a British show, about a middle-aged woman who has a sexual reawakening, leading to major life changes. It’s essentially about fucking to terms with things.

No word yet on whether she’ll have three shrill, shoe-worshiping friends, but you can bet there will be puns. So very many puns. [EW.com]

Amazing. The media is so intent on displaying sex in ads, TV shows, movies, magazines, etc., because we all know that sex sells. Unfortunately, we’re only supposed to look at it, as if it were some kind of display piece. We’re not actually supposed to do it, much less enjoy it.

I know that I have some fellow bloggers who are pushing the 40 year mark, and even a few that are pushing 50. I say we strike a blow for sexual equality by screwing our way into old age – and enjoying it to the fullest extent. Let’s show the media that we’re mad horny as hell, and we’re not gonna take it anymore!

About Tom Allen

The Grey Geezer Dauntless defender of, um, something that needed dauntless defending. Dammit, I can't read this script without my glasses. Hey, you kids, get off my damn lawn!
This entry was posted in Aging, Appearance, Body Image, Culture, Hot Married Sex, Marriage & Relationships, sex, Sexuality & Relationships and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

27 Responses to 50 is the new same old 50

  1. betme says:

    From a woman who is knee deep in my 40’s, I just wanted to thank you for pointing out that those of us past the age of “moistness”, according to the teenie bobbers, still have it together. In fact sex is so much better now then I could have imagined at 20 or 30 something. Who would have guessed?


  2. Jesus. As a teen ager, could you people come up with other words to describe genitals other than “dusty'” and “moist”? Dear lord.


  3. Fusion says:

    Well said Tom!
    As a almost 49 year young man, I’m just getting started, and have no intensions of stopping, Unless I died shagging, and what a way to go, ay? Age is just a number, and it only matters if you let it matter.


  4. em says:

    At 35 I’m just barely in the “old” category…. but I am thrilled to know I still have many years of fun times to look forward to. (Not that I doubted it). Great post, Tom!


  5. Kate says:

    Obviously, these are written by 20 something wannabe’s…hell, by your 40’s you’ve only just figured out what you want…and I am doing my best to fight back on this


  6. Verity says:

    Thanks for the article. I’m 75 and still quite active sexually. My sex life has never been better.


  7. gillette says:

    Ha…David Schnarch (marriage and sex therapist) suggests that real sex doesn’t even START until 50.

    Hm…so women under 40 don’t have cellulite or stretch marks, eh? Yeah, right…

    My body has become more orgasmic with time, not less….and I’m 51.

    And, yeah…I’m gonna go down fucking my brains out…hopefully someone over 40 because very few people under that really know what to do with a body besides pump away like bunnies.


  8. Tom Allen says:

    Betme – it sort of sneaks up on you, doesn’t it?

    PH – I’d like to believe that all the commenters are 20-somethings, but I think that a number of them are people approaching middle age and who continue to remain clueless.

    Fuse – I’m gonna be 50 very shortly, but 48/49 was a worse year. That was when I realized that I wasn’t going to stop aging.

    Em – I’m sorry, can we see some ID before you’re allowed to post here?

    Verity – you’re my hero!

    Kate – I have no doubt that you’re going to go down swinging.

    Ex-C – I think you’ve hit on why there is this glass ceiling. It actually takes a lot of work – time and effort – to be a good lover. Most people do not have the inclination to learn, and so they think that sex is and always will be simply a matter of pumping away.

    That’s why I keep saying that good sex is actually all foreplay, punctuated by an occasional orgasm.


  9. fusion77 says:

    Verity is my hero too, but so is Gillette. It took you that long to realise Tom? Shit, I saw it a looonnngggg time ago… You must have been traveling down that river in Egypt 😉


  10. Elizavetta says:

    Personally, I’m actually quite glad to be rid of the angst-fest that my 40’s turned out to be. So, here’s to the Fucking Fifties! And I’m not talking about Elvis.

    Verity, you GO, honey!

    Thanks for writing this post, Tom. Have I told you lately that I love your blog??


  11. em says:



  12. Dave says:

    Happy Birthday, Tom. 🙂


  13. Tom Allen says:

    Fuse – Denial?I dunno, but my health scare last year was a bit of an eye-opener.

    Dave – thanks, bud!

    Ezv – 50 is the new 30!
    And I never get tired of you telling me how much you love this blog 😉


  14. Dave says:

    Re: age bias

    After about the dozenth (is that a word?) crack about old people (men, mostly) on a bb I used to frequent, I started a thread entitled, “Fat Chicks. Ewwwwww!”

    It was entirely tongue in cheek, and I was trying to make the point that, while negative comments about fat (something that, for most people, is fixable) are generally off-limits, pejorative cracks about age seem to be hilariously funny.

    There was outrage aplenty, but no one got the picture. 😦


  15. darklily says:

    If I show this entry to the DH, he will be glued to it for hours …just because of the Kim Cattrall photos.

    That reminds me…isn’t *your* b-day coming up?

    Darklily (almost a young’un…I’ll be 37 next week)


  16. betme says:

    Dave ~ I would love to read that thread. Do you mind sharing a link?


  17. Tom Allen says:

    Dave – that’s because people can get away with it. I mean, what are you gonna do, beat them with your cane?

    DL – I can well imagine. Hell, it took me hours simply to look at all the pictures before I posted them 😉


  18. Personally I would fuck Kim Cattral before I went near SJP. She is sexy and sparkly.


  19. Tom Allen says:

    Sub Mom – Sexy and sparkly! I like that!


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  23. Malcolm says:

    I am 78 and my wife is fifty this month. In November last year 2007 we made a 15-minute video of us having sex for a well-known dating site: there are many videos on that site and ours has held the top spot for videos in our country for several months now, with many appreciative comments from both men and women.
    We may well make another video very soon, and I expect it to be different but just as erotic.


  24. Gilgamesh says:

    I am 78 and my wife is fifty this month. In November last year 2007 we made a 15-minute video of us having sex for a well-known dating site: there are many videos on that site and ours has held the top spot for videos in our country for several months now, with many appreciative comments from both men and women.
    We may well make another video very soon, and I expect it to be different but just as erotic. I have plans to explore the field of sexuality further.


  25. Gil – any chance that you could share a link with the rest of us?


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