Somebody found my blog through the interesting phrase “Mature Spandex.” I’ve long since given up trying to figure out why certain phrases lead people here (and yes, Marina Sirtis is still in the top 10), but this one caught my eye. I searched on it, just to see what came up, and as I scrolled through the hits, I saw a website promoting a woman named Jilly King. Curious to see what a “mature” woman in spandex looked like, I checked the pictures.1391869265


My first thought wasn’t “Wow, she’s hot,” or “Jeez, I wish she would…” or even “Get this freakin’ chastity device off of me.” No, my first thought was “She’s mature? She’s younger than I am!”

Holy freakin, cow! I mean, ignoring the part about me not living up to all of the definitions of the word, when did “mature” indicate 30 or maybe 40 years old, instead of, say, 50 or 60?

Okay, not that I’m denying that at 40, one should be considered as mature, at least in some context. But in the world of online erotica, the term “mature” has the connotation of “no longer young.” And when I see that, I’m reading “no longer young enough to be attractive.”


To me, Ms. King is young. Well, at least, younger. And it’s not just her, there are dozens, perhaps hundreds of other women who advertise themselves as “mature,” in hopes that you will pay for a subscription to their website.

Maybe I’m just surprised to discover that I’m now — quite literally –twice the age of most erotic models, and that even the women to whom I am attracted are of an age that now has to be labeled.

Labeled, apparently, because anyone that *enjoys* looking at 40 year old women obviously has a fetish.

About Tom Allen

The Grey Geezer Dauntless defender of, um, something that needed dauntless defending. Dammit, I can't read this script without my glasses. Hey, you kids, get off my damn lawn!
This entry was posted in Aging, Appearance, Body Image. Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to Maturation

  1. susan's pet says:

    Ok, you, personally, may not turn me on. I am more into women. But “mature” there are some teen-age assholes who think that being twenty is mature. Give me a frigging break!

    Sheesh! I have always liked older women beginnign when I was six. Ok, maybe back then I limited it to about thrity, but then, I was not all that selective. I just love women. Now, a few [quite a few] years later, my range has expanded toward the top. I have less yearning for the young, more for the mature. Go figure!


  2. maymay says:

    And you call yourself “not a sexuality activist.” Pshaw.


  3. acaptivatedman says:

    Mature: fully developed in body or mind, as a person: a mature woman.

    Yep, sounds about right. Just the ticket.

    I’m sure I’m not alone in finding the mainstream porn industry’s fascination with “tight teen bodies” slightly creepy. I’m about the same age as you and I know that my taste in women has matured with age. One presumes the pornmeisters know their target audience or they wouldn’t do it.


  4. acaptivatedman says:


    I don’t doubt that markets can be created but I was really talking about the predominance of young tight bodies in porn targetted at majority, mainstream (not kink), vanilla audiences.

    For example, there is a tabloid newspaper in the UK called “The Sun” (a dreadful little rag that happens to be the top-selling newspaper in the UK). Every day they have a page 3 girl – a model in a state of undress, who is always, always young with a tight body.

    Now, competition in the dead tree press is tremendous and they know the demographics of their readers inside out. If there was sufficient demand for “mature” women on page 3 you can bet they would have gone with it or one of their competitors would have.

    Whether the demand for “tight teens” has been created or is intrinsic, I don’t know, but I bet that if the porn guys saw demand for younger pornstars dropping and more mature pornstars rising, they would respond to it.


    • maymay says:

      Whether the demand for “tight teens” has been created or is intrinsic, I don’t know, but I bet that if the porn guys saw demand for younger pornstars dropping and more mature pornstars rising, they would respond to it.

      It sounds to me like you give the “pornmeisters” more credit than I do. 🙂 There are countless examples of demand that pornographers do not respond to.


  5. Tom Allen says:

    I don’t think I’m reacting so much to the market that’s been created as to the entire concept that sexually attractive = young & tight. It’s online erotica, it’s in ads, on tv and in the movies.

    We know about the Page 3 girls in the US; and again, the underlying assumption is that you have to publish pics of 22 year old Britnee, because that’s what men want to look at. I’m really curious as to what might happen should The Sun publish cheesecake shots of, say, Marina Sirtis, Sharon Stone, Kim Catrall, or, yes, Jilly King. Would the readers complain about having to look at old hags?

    And I’ll admit that I might be over-reacting. I guess it suddenly occurred to me that if attractive women are half my age, then perhaps *I’m* past the age of being attractive, myself.

    That, and it creeps me out a little to ogle women under 30.

    And ironically, when you consider that the *average* woman’s size is closer to a 10 or 12 (UK vs US), it proves that we are schizophrenic in our cultural appreciation of women.


    • maymay says:

      I guess it suddenly occurred to me that if attractive women are half my age, then perhaps *I’m* past the age of being attractive, myself.

      Tom, you’re not past the age of being attractive because, as a man, you don’t have such an age. 😉 I’m 25 now but probably won’t ever be a “page 3 guy.”


  6. Aarkey says:

    Well, well, well…

    The fact that you see mature as meaning “no longer young enough to be attractive” – is *your* definition.

    I just think it means fully developed and ripe 😀


  7. allforher says:

    Back in the old days “mature” in porn meant some body who looked like they were in their 60’s at least. I’d hate to think that “mature” now equals somebody my age.

    Then again, I get sad when I see an attractive woman in her 40’s and somebody calls her a cougar and then I realise that for her to be a cougar she’d have to date somebody younger than me. If she dated me she would just be a hot chick in her 40’s.


  8. susan's pet says:

    The mature look is in the eye of the beholder.

    Hell, if I look at a woman younger than twenty-six, I feel like I should be charged with pedophelia.


  9. ptathuk says:


    It’s interesting how one’s tastes change with age. In part, I think, due to the possibility that humans can choose to mate for life. The only way this is achieved is obviously a *maturing* of ones view: ” what makes an attractive mate?”

    I think it sad that some women are so insecure that they think that spending enough to buy a small car on cosmetics is the answer to keeping hubby interested. It is, of course nothing of the sort. As you’ve put so well in these pages, it’s finding a common ground in both partner’s fantasies. (Sorry for the over-simplification.)

    Your list of models is also interesting. I’d like to add that the most famous fetish model of all time, Bettie Page, was in her mid thirties during the late fifties, when she posed for Irving and Paula. Her stunning grace and playfull displays of innocent fun showed a maturity well beyond her years. I guess this leads me to distinguish between maturity of character and mere looks.

    To illustrate the different levels of maturity, the best page 3 reference I’ve seen was used in the sitcom Yes Prime Minister:

    Hacker: Don’t tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers: the Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country; The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country; The Times is read by people who actually do run the country; the Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country; the Financial Times is read by people who own the country; The Morning Star is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country; and The Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it already is.

    Sir Humphrey: Prime Minister, what about the people who read The Sun?

    Bernard: Sun readers don’t care who runs the country, as long as she’s got big tits.

    Think or thwim!



  10. Her knight says:

    Anyone on here remember the phrase “Don’t trust anyone over 30”? This seems like some variant – ageism lives on. Tom, welcome to cranky old fart status. More crunches, anyone?


  11. havingmycake says:

    You know what, I think I look better now than I did when I was 20 and Im certainly not short of male admirers in their 20s, whereas when I was 20, guys didnt seem that interested in me. Maybe what’s matured is my own self-love. They always say that if you are confident in yourself that makes you more attractive to others.

    Graham Norton this week featured Katie Price (aka Jordan)… well actually it featured Katie Price’s new LA boob job because those things were so big and pushed up, they seemed to have entirely taken control of the rest of her body… plus Jo Brand and Jackie Collins. The latter were far more interesting and normal than Katie, who had clearly applied her make-up with a trowel and, besides her huge boobs, had also had her lips botoxed into an entity of their own. It was most peculiar to watch.

    The trouble is that all our Page 3 girls now aspire to be Jordan. Their tits are all fake, their lips are all fake, their thighs and bottoms have been lyposuctioned into their current form and almost every teenage girl wants to do the same in order to achieve the same 5 minutes of fame. It’s really really frightening.


  12. Kim Crystal says:

    Yes, in the adult entertainment world, “mature” means 30. “MILF” can mean 18 if she’s had a baby.

    It’s a strange universe.


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