I’ll Tumbl for you

Having grown up well before the internet, I often wonder on how the hell any of us ever managed to look at porn back in those days. I mean, there always used to be some around; the older brother of a friend who left used magazines, a found stash near a playground, or maybe somebody’s father’s supply of Playboy or Penthouse hidden behind the tools in the garage. But the really good stuff was usually hard to come by, and those of us living in small towns often had to make do with the Sears catalogue, newspaper ads, and movie posters.

“Lover, I know we’ve been trying this chastity thing for a couple of months, but I’ve been thinking that it’s just not working for me. All that keeping track of how many days, letting you out when I don’t feel like it, and hearing you whine to be released when you’re feeling horny just isn’t what I expected. So I’ve decided that the only way this can work is for me to be totally, one hundred percent in control. From now on, I will take the keys, and I will decide how long you stay in; and believe me, it’s going to be a long time. We’re going to do this seriously, or not at all.”

This is one of the reasons that I’ve been so fascinated with Tumblr for the last few weeks. I mean, I’d known about the micro-slash-photo blogging-slash-social-networking platform for several years, but as I’ve barely been able to keep up with the current batch of web forums and with writing this blog, I’ve never looked much beyond a few pictures posted by somebody I already know (mainly Thumper, Maymay, and more recently, Dev).

I don’t know when that changed, but not long ago I found that I was spending enough time surfing to warrant actually starting my own, mainly with the idea of re-blogging the cool stuff I’d been looking at. Re-blogging is, of course, a nod to those old days when you passed old magazines along to your friends in exchange for others that they may have found. Even back in the dial-up BBS days, porn somewho found it’s way onto your hard drive, and you were expected to post it on the local BBS in exchange for anything else that you were able to download.

More importantly than the titillation though, is that the Tumblr blogging platform acts alike a tracking database so that one can usually follow the original uploader of the picture so that the credit can go where it would be appropriate. Too often  the proper attributions for interesting photos are lost, but re-blogging allows you to find the person who uploaded a picture and (hopefully) to ask them where it came from, or who the subjects are. Personally, I’m glad to see a mechanism in place to help give credit where it’s due; it’s much too easy for the credits to get lost on photos (and stories, etc.) as they get passed around the web.

All that said, I find that I’m a bit surprised at some of the pictures I’ve been spotting. I mean, I know we all have different tastes, which is fine. But my complaint about the number of pictures in certain generes echoes my thoughts on video porn. For example, what is the fascination with “money shots”, that is, pictures of women who have just had semen sprayed all over their face, chest, or other areas? I mean, damn — I know that when I’m pumping away and I’m about to have a massive orgasm, the last thing I want to do is to pull out and let loose with my hand. I don’t like that type of shot in videos, and I’m not crazy about it in stills, either.

"Now, really honey, look at it my way: for the last few years you've spent well over a thousand dollars on viagra so you could be ready for sex when *you* wanted. This year, I'm spending less than two hundred dollars so you can be ready for sex whenever *I* want."

And here’s something that I’m noticing lately that I don’t think I’ve run across before: what’s the deal with all the pictures  of men and women peeing on each other? I know, it’s my own squick, but, much like the facials mentioned above, I find the practice to be a bit degrading. Or maybe that’s just the point, and I’m not wired in a way that allows me to understand  it.

Anyway, I’m sure it won’t surprise anybody that I’ve been liking and reblogging a fairly decent variety of pictures. As I go back and look at them, it’s interesting to note what it says about my taste in what I perceive as erotic. I have some very curvy women, but I also have some muscular, athletic women. There’s a handful of pics of women wearing items in my two favorite colors: tight and shiny. There’s a smattering of cheesecake, including some scans of vintage magazine pinups. There are soem pictures with a femdommish air.  And there’s a few odd pictures of (what I find to be) attractive women of a (very wide!) variety of ages in various states of dress.

“Yeah, I know that idiot Tom Allen writes that nobody is forcing you to wear a chastity device, and that any man who wants out can just force his partner to give him the key. So, I’m telling you right now, honey: any time you want out, you just force me to give you the key, all right?”

Now, you might suspect that I’d have some pictures suggestive of enforced male chastity… and you would be correct. Since the search term “chastity captions” brings a lot of readers to Edge of Vanilla, I figured that it’s something that a lot of people might be interested in seeing, so I have a number of vaguely erotic pictures that I’ve captioned in the comment section (thereby still keeping the original picture traceability).

So, if you’ve read this far, you’re probably wondering how to find this stuff.  Since I’m not very original, my photo blog is called:
The Edgier Vanilla

If you are looking specifically for chastity-related pictures, you can skip the dull, boring shots of curvy women in spandex and look for the photo tags like : chastity or denial. Other tags that might excite your interest are curvy, mature, muscle, or shiny. And yeah, there’s other stuff, too, so feel free to poke around.

About Tom Allen

The Grey Geezer Dauntless defender of, um, something that needed dauntless defending. Dammit, I can't read this script without my glasses. Hey, you kids, get off my damn lawn!
This entry was posted in Blog Candy, Blogging, Chastity Captions, Eye Candy, Tumblr and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

18 Responses to I’ll Tumbl for you

  1. Jz says:

    I’ve already been visiting there and I’m here to give you a thumbs-up!
    It’s nice to find a site where someone appreciates and displays a wide variety of eye-candy. (I don’t count Blond Barbie, Brunette Barbie, and Redhead Barbie as “variety”…)

    Careful, or you could become my hero…
    😉

  2. slave_nemo says:

    As a member of Chastity Mansion (http://chastitymansion.com) I can tell you that the Captioned Photos section of their gallery is by far the most popular. Though I have not run across many captioned photos dealing with other subjects, I am sure they are out there, too.

    P.S. I like yours, Tom. Keep them coming.

    • Tom Allen says:

      Yeah, it’s the weirdest thing – That one post I did on chastity captions last year became one of the top posts on the blog.

      I think it’s the element of story telling that attracts people.

  3. overwrought says:

    Oh no, tumblrs are so addictive.. and now I can’t stop looking at yours! 😛 Very nice variety in your pics, btw.

  4. Ayesha says:

    Off topic.
    I noticed ur struggle to get ur comment published on John’s blog, without result. If u want, i could give it a try and post it for u. Let me know.

    Note: This is a 1 time offer only 🙂

  5. Sex Fairy says:

    I LOVE to tumbl! It’s totally addicting, but I find there are only so many ways to photograph a BLOW JOB, so I’m always looking for something strikingly beautiful or hot.
    But…blowjobs are one of my favorite activities. The fun doesn’t always translate, though. Maybe that’s what’s going on with the plethora of ‘pop shots’ as well. It looked hot and porn-y to someone, and now the trend has just…ahem…snowballed.

  6. Agotaras says:

    And here’s something that I’m noticing lately that I don’t think I’ve run across before: what’s the deal with all the pictures of men and women peeing on each other?

    I never figured you for a wine snob. Perhaps you have just not found the right vintage of golden champagne. May I suggest something in a full bodied redhead cira 1974? A sassy bouquet with just a subtle hint of asparagus.

    • Tom Allen says:

      Agotaras, I once again bow to your superior wisdom.

      BTW, I would consider it a personal favor if you would drop me an email to let me know what you’re up to.

  7. Steve M says:

    The money shot thing is very weird, I agree.

    Gail Dines’ recent-ish work on the porn industry has thrown up the disturbing fact that:

    “In a recent study, 80% of men said that the one sex act they would most like to perform is to ejaculate on a woman’s face; in 2007, a comment stream on the website Jezebel.com included a number of women who said that, on a first date, they had, to their surprise, experienced their sexual partner ejaculating on their faces without asking.”

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/jul/02/gail-dines-pornography

    I have done this, but y’know, we did discuss it beforehand. It was actually more for her than me.

    The thought of whipping it out AT THE POINT OF ORGASM and saying SURPRISE seems, just, so, damn, weird, to, me.

    But hell its been a long time since I was on a first date.

    • Ayesha says:

      Studies, studies, and more studies. And men who want this and that, and as it seems, especially that. It’s my experience that the babble of men regarding sex, resembles their talk about their fishing adventures and the enormous fish they always seem to have caught. Porn bosses eagerly take advantage of that, creating a world which is even more remote from r/l than the virtual world. But ah…..don’t forget all them studies eh? Rofl. Oh, and watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FV8n_E_6Tpc

    • Tom Allen says:

      Hah! I love Cindy Gallop. If I were a woman, I’d want to be her.

  8. Tom Allen says:

    The thought of whipping it out AT THE POINT OF ORGASM and saying SURPRISE seems, just, so, damn, weird, to, me.

    Or something. I mean, I do understand the reasoning that back in the old days, the money shot was “proof” that the actors were actually having sex (although, for the life of me I can’t understand why that matters). But have we now adopted that practice in the mainstream? Or do some men simply want to view this because it makes them think that they, themselves are a porn star?

  9. Ludlow says:

    Great selection of pics. Appreciate you letting me stay on the Internet for a little longer. The door hasn’t hit me in the ass yet.

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