How young?

I like my women the way I like my coffee: strong, hot, and witty. That’s one of the reasons that I read Fern’s blog Domme Chronicles.

Her recent post “How Old?” has nothing to do with wit, though. Instead, it brings up a serious question: How do you deal with a young person with a sincere interest in BDSM? It’s already difficult enough to talk to young people about sex, because so many roadblocks are there, from religious and conservative groups who try to discourage it for moral reasons, to liberal and politically correct groups that try to discourage it because of the potential for power abuse.

But the inherent possibilities for a teen or very young adult to get sucked into a bad relationship with a jackass masquerading as a dominant may weigh – ethically speaking – on any one of us who is witness to such a situation.

Back when Usenet was a more frequented medium, I was a regular on the group soc.sexuality.general; it was a great place for adults to discuss various aspects of sexuality without (much) fear of judgment, and the group managed not to become a pickup dating site. Because of this, it had a large number of women regulars, so there was always a good mix of new and experienced people.

Once in a while, there would be a visitor who would ask questions, and who would reveal (as much as can be believed on the internet) to be considerably younger than the norm. Most of the group members would simply stop conversing with underaged teens for fear of the potential legal ramifications. And indeed, this was always a difficult decision because we’re so torn with wanting to be a good resource, but not wanting to be arrested for contributing to the delinquency of a minor (a legal issue here in the US).

Anyway, go visit Ferns, tell her I sent you, and then let’s have a discussion.