Ruin ALL the things!

So, Mrs. Edge has discovered ruined orgasms.

Not hers, of course.

She’s long been aware of the idea that some of my orgasms aren’t actually pleasurable, and over the years has, at times, been quite taken with the notion that she has some power over that. Generally this has taken the form of getting me aroused enough (usually after several weeks) to ejaculate while I’m still locked into my chastity device, but she has occasionally experimented with “forcing” me to release by using a vibrator on the device, or sometimes pressing the Hitachi directly on me. Both situations give me a sensation of slightly reduced arousal, which paradoxically seems to make me even more aroused the next day. I suspect that this is because after several weeks of arousal, my body is expecting to have an actual, mind-blowing orgasm; but when my brain checks in the next day, it sees that the tubes haven’t been properly cleaned. Or something.

Anyway, we haven’t been doing the chastity thing much this year, and since we have both been in pretty stressful job positions lately, our intimate life has suffered a bit. So, a few months ago I was suggesting some ways to spice things up a little, and among some of the ideas I floated were ruined orgasms when I’m not locked up. She didn’t explore the issue, and we went on to discuss other things; I figured she had forgotten about it. Until December, that is.

One night, we were laying in bed reading (we usually sleep nude), and she reached over and began stroking me. This is always a welcome surprise, so I asked her to use some lube or cream, and if she would consider finishing me that way. She grabbed a bottle of hand lotion and continued to stroke and tease me, until I was writhing on the bed and lightly (very lightly — damn kids around) moaning. As soon as I was ready to come, my hips lifted off the bed in expectation, and and she stopped stroking as I felt her grip tighten firmly around my shaft. My hips bucked a few times, and my moans turned into a groan of surprised frustration. And then it was over.

Ruin ALL the orgasms!

“You’re frowning,” she said, looking at my face. Yeah, no kidding, I thought. She went to get a towel, and when she came back she said “I don’t think that I did it right. You’ve got come on you.” Yes, some had leaked out after she let go, which is to be expected. I cleaned up, thanked her, and we drifted off to sleep with murmurs of needing more practice. The next morning I was quite hard, and woke her up for a little action. Despite being aroused, I didn’t feel the need to come, so I left her to go back to sleep for a few hours.

A couple of weeks later, we were in the same situation; she was stroking me, and I asked her if she wanted to practice a little more. She thought it was a good idea, so we grabbed some lube, and within a few minutes she had me very aroused. While she stroked me, I tried to explain that instead of just wrapping her fingers around me, that she might have better control pressing her thumb along the underside, closer to the base of my shaft. Knowing that the urethra passes closer to that area, it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Mrs. Edge knows what I like, and after a little while I had to stop talking. Well, it was more like she had gotten me to the point where I was just babbling, anyway. And once again, just as I arched my hips I felt her squeeze, and her thumb bore down HARD. I felt my hands scrabbling at the sheets as my PC muscles tried to contract. I let out a small groan of frustration, and a few moments later it was all over. When she finally relaxed her grip, just a few drops leaked out.

“How was that?” she asked me. I had a hard time answering, in part because I was in some odd state of mind. The immediate need to come was gone, but nothing felt right; as far as my body was concerned, it wasn’t over over. On her part, she was again a bit disappointed to have allowed a few drops to leak out, and I had to assure her that with everything that goes through the plumbing, a few drops was perfectly normal.

We’ve now been practicing a bit more often; I’ve been agreeing to refrain from orgasm during intercourse so she can practice on me right afterward. And like so many things with regard to sex, this is something that sounds so freaking hot when you’re aroused, but then seems like a really stupid idea when it comes to actually doing it. I mean, I don’t  know about you, but I like orgasms. I love the explosive release, and the warm satisfaction immediately afterward. What the hell is the idea of leading all the way up to that, and stopping just short?

Goddam brain is paying tricks on me.

When I can step outside of myself to watch, though, I enjoy seeing Mrs. Edge move from a more passive form of ruined orgasms (that is, the involuntary releases that I’ve had) to a more active role. Her intentional ruining is, to me, exciting to think about (at least, beforehand), and she, herself gets excited about “practicing” (as she calls it). I know that she enjoys feeling me orgasm completely when I’m inside her, but this new-found hobby is also giving her a nice thrill, and allows her to gently explore her feelings about control. So, as long as she’s willing, how could I possibly pass that up?

About Tom Allen

The Grey Geezer Dauntless defender of, um, something that needed dauntless defending. Dammit, I can't read this script without my glasses. Hey, you kids, get off my damn lawn!
This entry was posted in Chastity & Orgasm Denial, orgasm control, orgasm denial, Ruined Orgasm, Sexuality & Relationships, True Tales and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

19 Responses to Ruin ALL the things!

  1. Celtic Queen says:

    Weird things arent they, the ruined ones. Hub hates and loves them in equal measure.


  2. Hedone says:

    I think I’ve found a new hobby 🙂 🙂

    Sounds like fun. I am in control in most aspects of my life…well until KG walked into it. I still need an outlet for the leader to reign and I think I’ve found just the thing. Surely he’ll be on board. If not maybe I’ll find some volunteers for my “practicing”.

    I’m not sure if ruined orgasms are the same for women. I have had times were I am so close to cumming, I can feel it, I am there…on the brink and…..nothin’. Yet, I am still so sensitive and highly aroused but I cannot orgasm; to even touch myself and try is too much…to sensitive. I sort of like the feeling but I’m also itchin’ to get off and frustrated that I cannot. Hard to explain.



  3. slave_nemo says:

    Welcome to the club! Ruined orgasms are such a conflict. I, like you, think they sound like a great idea… Until they actually happen. My problem is, Mistress tried it at my insistence. DOH! Now she loves them so much, that I may NEVER get a full one again unless I can figure out a way to fool her into allowing it.


  4. Michele says:

    Mrs Edge,
    If you’re still having problems with leakage you might want to experiment with pressing in on his perineum, in the indention between his balls and anus, along with keeping the thumb on his shaft. I do that to Alan sometimes, and when you hit the right spots *nothing* comes out. Drives him nuts.

    Sorry Mr. Edge, but we women have to stick together 😀

    Sorry, this got spam filtered for some reason, and I didn’t get to any moderating over the weekend. I’ll be sure to mention this 🙂


  5. Buck says:

    Mr. Edge:

    I discovered all this very recently, and I was immediately hooked. It’s like trying not to laugh at a funeral. Less is much, much more. I’m afraid to talk much with my sweetie about it; she’s a mean little thing, and I’m not sure I want to give her ideas! It’s not easy being a guy.

    Thanks for nothing!


  6. Ric C says:

    … and allows her to gently explore her feelings about control. So, as long as she’s willing, how could I possibly pass that up?

    Our wish to have our wives more involved does ruin our orgasms… but not the fun!!!


  7. Tom, You’ve got it! As with other aspects of MC, the idea of a ruined orgasm is hot, but the reality of it isn’t… at all.


  8. denimskirts says:

    Please consider thinking more critically about your use of the phrase “ruined orgasm.” These distinctions are important.


    • Tom Allen says:

      Hi DS – I’m not sure how important those distinctions are to most people, but until we all have a common syntax, “ruined” covers most of the bases; the context and the story should make the style of ruining clear.


  9. My understanding is that the point of ruined orgasms is to trigger ejaculation (with no pleasure) so the chastity play can go on and the guy’s prostate will stay healthy (being too “backed up” can be physically damaging, or something).

    And yet you and Mrs. Edge seem to want nothing to come out of you. And I’d assume you know more about this stuff than I do, since you actually DO chastity play and I’ve only read a few things on the internet in passing.

    So…am I wrong about the prostate health thing?


    • Tom Allen says:

      First, understand that “ruined orgasm” is a catch-all phrase, and there are several varieties. Some orgasms are ruined by allowing a man to finish, but distracting him, usually with pain, during the climax. Generally, however, it refers to the practice of stopping just short of climax. Men will typically reach a point of no return (i.e., they can no longer hold back), but still need a few more moments (say, a half to two seconds) of stimulation to boost them over the edge into a physical peak. Stopping just at the point of no return will stimulate ejaculation without allowing the pleasurable “Aaahhh, yeeeaahh!” feeling. This can be done by stopping the stimulation just at that point, for example, just letting go of your hand (sometimes called an “abandoned orgasm”). More insidious, however, is the constriction, which stops the stimulation, *and* keeps the PC muscles from providing any internal stimulation.

      There is some medical disagreement as to how often men need to ejaculate in order to stay healthy, and the commonly held wisdom (ranging from once a week to one a month) has no basis in science that we know of. However, once you get to the point where the ejaculation has started, you’re already clearing out the tubes; constricting the urethra simply diverts some of the semen into the bladder, while some remains in the vesicles, waiting to drain out or be reabsorbed.

      In our case, Mrs. Edge has been under the assumption that if *any* semen comes out, then I’ve enjoyed myself too much. But once the spasms stop, there will be a few drops left inside that will leak out, one way or the other.

      Was this helpful?


  10. scott Kelly says:

    Hi Tom,

    Em was humping me with the new dildo the other night and had decided to let me cum. She was stroking me and just as I tipped over the edge she lost her grip. Before she could get me back in hand the peak moment had been lost and I was totally frustrated yet drained. It will be quite sometime before I have another cum so I just have to wait.

    It was particularly frustrating since it was her intention to let me have a big orgasm. I think it made the experience all the more effective.


    Mrs. Kelly’s Playhouse


  11. JewelsAndB says:

    The interesting thing about ruined orgasms is that there are so many methods leading to the madness. Jewels enjoys tying me down, then bringing me just to the edge and watching me strain at my restraints as the point of no return crumbles down into just a dribble… I will have to suggest the constriction method next time I am eligible for one. Of course, that won’t be until after June. 😦


  12. MissH213 says:

    I also love to “practice”. It’s such a power trip to control the male orgasm this way. I think it feeds the part of me that’s still a 20 yr old just learning about feminism. “Oh, so you think I shouldn’t have a right to vote? Take THAT!, male oppressor!” I write this with a great deal of tongue in cheek, but that is a small part of what makes it fun for me. 🙂


  13. Pingback: I feel like an archaeologist… « The Edge of Vanilla

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