Exercising Restraint

When you read the groups and message boards, it becomes apparent that guys who are into (heh heh) chastity devices are essentially looking for The Holy Grail. A device has to be secure, but it has to be comfortable. It has to be inescapable, but it can’t show up in clothing. It has to be capable of being worn 24/7 for weeks or months, but it has to be hygienic and easily cleaned. It has to be It has to be impossible to open, but needs to allow the Keyholder easy access. It has to be lightweight, but solid stainless steel. Or titanium. And easily modified in case one loses or gains weight. And it needs to provide absolutely free range of unhindered movement.

This last point becomes apparent over the summer, when the message boards (including our Chastity Forums) see an influx of members asking questions like “What kind of chastity device is good for wearing while I’m running/ jogging/ bicycling/ rock climbing/ swimming, etc.?”  And then we have another thread discussing the relative merits of this or that device, usually followed up with at least one person talking about how it was horrible for that activity, and to later be countered by someone saying that he had no problem, and hell, he actually forgot that he was wearing one.

After a dozen or more years of reading chastity oriented groups, it occurred to me that I don’t remember anyone saying something like “It’s not a life-support system, it’s only a sex toy. Just take the damn thing off for an hour, why don’t you?”

I mean, seriously?

When I took up serious exercising a few years ago, I went through a lot of time and trouble to find things that were compatible with my device. I modified the hell out of several different devices, and managed to lift weights, do a little running, and take up bicycling. And it worked — for a year or so.

But the more healthy improvements I saw from lifting weights and riding bikes, the more I was motivated to lift heavier and ride more. Eventually I got to the point where I simply no longer felt safe, let alone comfortable, with a device on. Oh sure, Thumper manages to throw some iron around, but frankly, he’s a masochist. After a few times catching the end of my device on a deadlift, I decided that wasn’t going to risk injury. So I gave up… deadlifting.

But over the course of several years, I went from riding 5 miles on an upright hybrid bike, to riding 50 miles on a sleek alloy road machine. You know, the kind with the long, narrow saddle, and the handlebars dropped low, and all that. After several experiments with saddles (expensive) and more device modding, I said “Screw it,” and just went out the way nature intended: with nothing but tight, padded lycra shorts between me and my saddle (for those of you unaware, cyclists in shorts are always going “commando.” The more you know.).

Yeah, I know. Blasphemy. Heresy. Traitor.

Whatevs. The point is that I decided not to let sex play (because again, chastity devices are sex toys) get in the way of maintaining and improving my health.

Giving the devices a rest for a while has enabled me to re-focus, or at least, to take a different perspective. For example, the other day I hopped onto the bike for a quick ride, and forgot that I still was wearing a cock ring. I made it to the end of the street and realized it was simply not going to work. I circled the block, ran into the garage to remove the ring, and then set off again. There was no way that I was going to be 15 miles out and finding myself too chafed to continue.

Admittedly, it’s easier for me to say this since Mrs Edge and I decided to take a little break from the devices. When I was wearing them all the time, I was naturally focused on what would work and what wouldn’t in various situations: which pants were better for concealing the bulge, which underwear was more supportive, which activities were easier to manage, how to discretely adjust myself during a pinch or twist. All of that became second nature. Now, whenever I see the questions about how to wear a device while running, or how does it affect road cycling, I have to admit that instead of reviewing the design specs, the first thing that pops into my head is “Just take the damned thing off for a couple of hours, and go running!”

Is it the fear that you won’t be able to avoid the temptation to manhandle yourself? I can tell you that before I go out for a ride in the hilly New England terrain, the last thing I want to do is make myself more relaxed by rubbing one out. Likewise, when I’m huffing and puffing up the local hills, the last thing I’m thinking about is my dick. I’m thinking “My lungs are on fire!” or “Why the fuck did I take this route?” or sometimes “Shut up, legs!” And when I’m finally on a descent, I’m not thinking about my balls, I’m thinking “I hope the ruts and potholes don’t get any worse, because I don’t want to get thrown off at 30 mph,” or “This is a pretty windy road; I hope the cars coming up aren’t crossing over the center into my lane.” Believe me, by the time I get home, my adrenaline and testosterone have been fighting with each other, and the rest of my body is too sore to even think about wanking.

To be fair, I also see guys on chastity groups try to convince some newb why he could — or even should — wear his device 24/7; often going pretty far in their attempts to overrule objections or concerns.

“Well, I work in security, so there might be metal detectors…”

“No problem! Just get the Holy Bone 3 in silicone and the plastic locks, and you won’t set off any alarms.”

Such responses probably induce a mindset in new guys which makes them think that 24/7 is the only acceptable way. I mean, why bother if you’re not going to do it the “right” way?

Look, I’m not trying to denigrate anyone who is legitimately trying to make their chastity device a 24/7 adventure. If you only run for a few minutes on a treadmill, or if you only bike 5 miles down the local trail, then maybe things will work out for you. This was really just a public service reminder that it’s perfectly okay to allow yourself a little break for the important things. Setting a record for non-stop cage time is fun, but don’t let it overshadow other things in your life which are just as fun, and possibly even more important.

Edit: The will-be-venerable-before-he-knows-it Thumper has a responsible opposing viewpoint  over here.




I can’t explain it, but this picture of a younger Lady Sonia really does something for me.

“Now Tom, you’ve been thinking too much about having an orgasm. Way too much. That’s why I’m going to help take your mind off of those kinds of thoughts, so you can be more focused on me.”









About Tom Allen

The Grey Geezer Dauntless defender of, um, something that needed dauntless defending. Dammit, I can't read this script without my glasses. Hey, you kids, get off my damn lawn!
This entry was posted in CB3000, CB6000, Chastity & Orgasm Denial, Chastity Devices, Sexuality & Relationships. Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to Exercising Restraint

  1. Roberto says:

    Finally I see a tip about chastity devices and bike riding and what is it: take the device off. How disappointing, how common sense like.


  2. slave_nemo says:

    Well said, Tom! I may send some readers to your site to read this.It’s high time folks used common sense!


  3. Cava Supernova says:

    Really informative post, and love your writing style too. I love your blog – great resource for a chastity rookie like me.


  4. Pingback: The sporting life | Denying Thumper

  5. Thomas K says:

    Hi Tom. For a couple of years ago, i bought myself a silicone model and it worked out fine. Then i discovered that it was easy to get of, so i bought a new one in hard plastic with 3 types of spikes.. they do the job, believe me ! (curve). I asked Lion about his morning erection, `cos mine hurts with them spikes on. What do u do ? Thomas K


  6. spiderdomme says:

    It makes me happy to see someone with this view. I’ve never used a device on anyone (mental orgasm control/denial, yes – steel or plastic, no) and to be honest, it’s the “militant chastity” crowd that turns me off of devices altogether.


    • Tom Allen says:

      LOL – it was the militant “People who use devices aren’t *really* doing it right,” crowd that used to irritate me a few years ago, until I realized that both sides really aren’t talking about the same thing. Chastity devices are more like a bondage kink, while denial enthusiasts display more of an obedience kink. Both are cool, but they are different kinks; the confusion is that they only appear to be the same on the surface because of the end result: no orgasms.

      As an example, Mrs. Edge really, really likes the idea of a device because it puts the control in her hands, and removes any issues of my own self control, will power, obedience, or whatever you want to call it. And while I like the device because of that reason, I also have learned to enjoy exercising my own restraint and self control.

      Chastity devices can be fun, but I can’t think of any that offer all degrees of security, convenience, and comfort. It’s important (IMO) not to obsess over trying to fit a square peg into the round hole of daily life.


  7. Jerry says:

    I think that after wearing a loris 2d and much hygienic diligence I found no reason to be let out device, It took patience and focus and after it was sorted, skiing hiking and camping were all possible, the fantasy was real!!!! I could not get out,I think the real drive and kink for me is that before my exercise or anything comes first its her comfortable possession of me .
    just my thoughts


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