May in June

The scene negotiations were hot; not so much overtly sexual as they were emotionally intense. I watched as the young man in tight black T-shirt and faded jeans snugged over snake-thin hips tried to read the intentions of his partner: an attractive, soulful-eyed young woman, similarly clad and exuding an innate confidence that gave her the appearance of being older than her years.

It was obvious that the young man wanted something, but there was some hesitant delicacy in his ability to express it. He leaned toward her, and I saw that it wasn’t just the air conditioning which had brought his nipples to attention under the skin tight fabric — the small barbell piercings held them permanently erect. He tried again to elicit some agreement from her, but she still seemed reluctant, as if she were torn between her own hungers and desires, yet trying to be sensitive to his needs. The tension was palpable; they both wanted something, but seemed to be testing each other. Finally, she asserted her dominance, and settled the negotiations to their mutual agreement. The scene was about to begin.

“No, I want my own Philly cheese steak sandwich,” she told him, imperiously. “You can just get whatever you want.”

Slightly envious of the way that they could order such food with abandon, I asked for a grilled chicken sandwich (for which I later removed the bread to reduce the carb count) and a glass of water. It was a small Greek pizza restaurant at the woodsy edges of the greater New Haven area, and I was sitting across the booth from Maymay and Helio Trope.

I don’t often get out to meet other bloggers or internet friends, so it was a most pleasant surprise when Maymay emailed me a few weeks ago, wondering if I’d like to meet for a bit before he packed his few worldly belongings and headed out west. He was headed back to NYC, and realized that he would be passing my neck of the woods. I invited them for dinner at the Edge household, but as things worked out, the only time we could meet was going to be mid-week for a late lunch. Mrs. Edge was unable to drive down to meet us, but the consolation prize was that Maymay and the attractive and engaging Helio Trope were able to first stop by my little manufacturing business to get the quick tour.

It was while walking around a grimy, old machine shop that I discovered something about Maymay; he’s unbelievably fascinated with everything around him. I’ve taken people around my place and watched them look around nervously, or sometimes with a sense of boredom. It’s not surprising; we rarely get a chance to see how things work outside of our own jobs, and the lack of context often makes such information as exciting as looking at your grandparent’s vacation slides of Delaware.

May, on the other hand, looked at everything, and tried to make it fit into some kind of context in which he could better understand it. We briefly discussed the kind of programming that I do (machine controls), and he made some analogies between what I do and how I do it to some of the things that he, himself does. Unfortunately, we weren’t running any really cool machining jobs at the time, but he seemed no less impressed. The tour finished, and we headed out to lunch so we could chat more openly.

During lunch, we realized that we had known each other for about 10 years, having met and run across each other at different times in various online groups and forums. Ten years? That’s like, what, half a century in Internet time, isn’t it?

The problem with meeting friends for lunch is the short amount of time that you have to to catch up. I felt like we were trying to squeeze in ten years of questions in an hour or so. We touched on quite a few topics — setting up munches and groups (and the various group dynamics that invariably go along with them), internet communication, blogging, Fetlife and other online groups, Male Submission Art, and his plans for the immediate future.

Surprisingly, we only barely touched on the topics of chastity and orgasm denial; surprising mainly because those kinds of groups were the ones in which he and I would frequently meet. I did, however, give him a set of stainless steel locking pins and spacers out of the prototypes that I’ve been working on. Later on, I noticed that Helio Trope was wearing a Masterlock key on her necklace, the kind that is usually sold with the CBx000 devices.

It came up in conversation that the two of them had been talking about something, and Helio Trope suggested that I might be a good one to contact about it. Unfortunately, I don’t know if we actually talked about whatever that topic was. May or Helio, if you’re reading this, drop me a line and let me know.

In person, Maymay was every bit as hyper as I’d expected him to be from his writing. I found him to be quick, bright, and engaging. Similarly, even though I’d never met Helio Trope (online or off), I found her to be very comfortable to talk to, and by the end of lunch it seemed like we were all chatting like old friends. It was a most enjoyable time, marred only by my trying very hard not to eat the side of thick, crispy french fries on my plate. At the end, I hope I did not embarrass them by grabbing the check; in my own personal mythology, I was simply helping out some nice, younger people.

I wish both of them every success.

Unintended Paradigm

What would life in a Matriarchy actually be like?

I know that the FLR and Female Supremacists fantasize about walking around naked and being made to do humbling tasks. However, a report on the Mosuo, a matriarchal group in southern China, provides some interesting and contradictory insights.

Men Live Better Where Women Are In Charge

Here’s a rather interesting paragraph:

SPIEGEL ONLINE: What is life like for a man in a matriarchy?

Coler: Men live better where women are in charge: you are responsible for almost nothing, you work much less and you spend the whole day with your friends. You’re with a different woman every night. And on top of that, you can always live at your mother’s house. The woman serves the man and it happens in a society where she leads the way and has control of the money. In a patriarchy, we men work more — and every now and then we do the dishes. In the Mosuo’s pure form of matriarchy, you aren’t allowed to do that. Where a woman’s dominant position is secure, those kinds of archaic gender roles don’t have any meaning.

And this note for those of you who are planning to move there:

SPIEGEL ONLINE: Is Mosuo society a paradise for feminists?

Coler: I had expected to find an inverse patriarchy. But the life of the Mosuo has absolutely nothing to do with that. Women have a different way of dominating.

The article was fascinating, but far too short.

Go read it at Spiegel Online.

Then, come back and comment.

Nattering and Nabobbing

So, what with all the reviews of chastity devices, reporting and commentary on various sex news, posting pics of hot older women, and the rare HNT, it seems like I’ve gone quite a while since posting an actual blog post about, you know, me.

Things have been busy in the Edge household, although in a mundane sort of way. Children, work, family, church, PTA, bake sales, charity volunteering, etc., have taken up a lot of our time (as is usual), and with the warm weather we’re outside more, repairing and maintaining the homestead, and keeping an eye toward the weak spots in case of the zombie invasions.

That reminds me, I wanted to check prices on titanium crowbars.

Anyway, while the mundane things have been mundane, we’re managing to intersperse some interesting times in there, too. As it happens, this weekend marks sixty (that’s 6-0) days that I’ve been locked into my modified CB3000. The Birdlock needs a repair to the locking pin, and the 6000 split along the bottom seam from, uh, hydraulic pressure induced while under an excited state. That leaves the 3k, which, frankly, has proved to be the most durable device that I’ve used in the last several years.

It’s actually more than 60 days, when you consider that I was wearing a device pretty much every day before this period; but I had access to a key, should I need to remove a device – which I only did for the sake of repair or modification. Oh, or sex, which we were kind of having on a regular basis, which was a nice change from not having it on a regular basis all winter. When I think about it, I’ve pretty much been wearing a device since the beginning of the year.

Mrs. Edge has not permitted me to release for the entire time that she has taken the key, although a couple of weeks ago it just sort of happened. In fact, it came on so quickly that I was barely aware of what was happening; but when I finally got the signal and tried to pace myself to hold back, Mrs. Edge (not realizing my state, being focused on her own), kept urging me on. The result was that as I was taking her with her favorite strap-on, I released while still wearing the 3k. When she finally came to her senses, she was a little ticked off, but it didn’t stop her from having me continue for another fifteen minutes until she was properly sated.

Here’s one of those weird things: The release was enough to take the edge off the arousal, and for a day I was thinking “Damn, I’m so tired of wearing this freakin’ cage.” But after a day, when I looked back on being compelled to keep sexxin’ her after my release, it seemed, well, kind of hot. Naturally I told her about it a week later, and she sort of understood. Well, I think she understood; it’s just that I told her while we were having sex, and she kept making these moaning noises and nodding her head and stuff.

I don’t know if we’re doing another really long term session, although it certainly looks like we’re headed that way. She keeps telling me that it’s going to last at least until August, but we have definitely switched things up a bit. A while back, when we were talking about starting another session, I told her that I got the impression that once she allowed me to come, that is, have an actual sanctioned orgasm, then it seems like she loses interest in continuing. And she admitted that she does; even after 20 years of marriage, she still has this idea that sex is done after I orgasm; she sort of extended that concept to our chastity play. Apparently a lot of women feel the same way, although to be fair, a lot of men also feel the same way: after they come, they lose interest. I don’t, of course, but she hasn’t quite internalized this.

What did come up in one of our chats, though, is that she seemed surprised that I would consider her putting me right back into the device immediately after allowing me to come. She assumed that the post-orgasm period would make me resistant. I explained that being compelled to do something when I don’t want to do it is part of what makes it hot. But I also expalined that part of the overall hotness was her control over my situation; the idea that I don’t know if she will allow me to come, or when, or how is exciting to me. And in talking, we found out that it’s exciting to her, as well.

What’s been even more exciting, though, is that for the last month or so we’ve tried to make a regular Friday night “sex date.” You’d think that having to schedule your schtupping might make it less exciting, but trust me, when you know it’s the one time a week that you’ll have an opportunity, you can manage to get into the mood. But in those date nights (during which, in case you missed it, I haven’t been allowed to come), we’ve made a point to talk about more about what we’re getting out of this and why it’s working. Mrs. Edge isn’t all that great about expressing how she feels, and this is partly because she never gives it any thought. But we’re working on it; she tries to think about things once in a while during the week and will mention it. I, of course, having to deal with wearing a plastic cage every day, think about it all the freakin’ time.

I’ve noticed that during our date nights, when I tell her how aroused I am, and how much I’ve been looking forward to it, even though I know she’s not letting me out, she becomes very aroused herself. The other night, we went at it so long and hard that her knees were literally trembling when she stood up. Wow, we haven’t had sex like that since we were dating. It’s taken a lot of work to get to this point, and while we’ve got some more work to do, at least we’ve finally reached a point where we’re both able to enjoy it, and to express why we enjoy it.

Keywords: Marina Sirtis, Orgasm Denial, Thigh Boots

Okay, I don’t get it. I mean, I’ve been saying for years that I don’t want The Edge of Vanilla to be known simply as Tom Allen’s Chastity Blog, although you’d never know it from the search hits that I get. According to my stats log, the keywords Chastity or Orgasm Denial are the most used terms to find this little corner of the fetish world that I’ve carved out.

Unbelievably, though, Marina Sirtis is the second most.

Mark that: During the last quarter, out of the hundreds of visitors each day who are searching on various fetishy, kinky, or BDSMy terms that land here, searches for Marina Sirtis are the second most common. Second. Number two.

It seems that I’ve had a lot of hits because of a post that I did last year in which I wrote about the top search terms. She was in the number three spot back then.

If I go back an entire year… oh, hell, let me just show you the Top 10:

2008-05-20 to Today

Search	Views
orgasm denial stories	2,061
marina sirtis	1,928
edge of vanilla	1,733
thigh boots	1,537
male chastity stories	1,405
orgasm denial	1,239
male chastity	866
tight leather	801
the edge of vanilla	414
cb6000	379

I mean, I can understand the rest of the numbers, but every week I’m always amazed to see Marina Sirtis never drops out of the top search terms. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course; Ms. Sirtis is a hot woman who looks arguably better at 54 than she did at 34 when she was playing Deanna Troi in the Star Trek: TNG series. So, because of that, and in acknowledgment of the release of the latest Star Trek movie, I poked around the various image hosting sites and grabbed a few Marina Sirtis pics. ‘cos beleive me, I love looking at her, too.

The latex Borg fakeup is an image I’ve run across a few times, and was done by the amazing artists at 4-F Creations. I’ve run across their stuff on the internet over the years, and I’m always amazed at the work. While this image is not on their free gallery, they do have some really cool fetishy shinyness – if you’re into that kind of thing. And chances are, anyone reading this is into that kind of thing.

I love this picture of Marina in a white, see-through blouse. It’s very sensual.

Some of these pictures seem to have come from a magazine shoot, but I have no idea which one.

I like these pictures more than the Deanna Troi pictures; Marina looks more human, more approachable.

The whole “older woman” thing is working for me right now. Okay, we’re only talking about 3 or 4 years, but hey.

Mmmm. Marina Sirtis. I hope that all of you who keep landing here are happy now.

La cage au coq: The Birdlock Review

It was Friday night. The weather was warm, so I’d left work an hour early and gone for good bike sprint. I changed, made dinner, stopped to see the guys, and had just gotten home. Mrs. Edge was away for the week, and I was talking to her on the phone, telling her about my day, when as I stepped out of the car, I felt something wriggle down the inside of my pants leg.

“What the hell?” I exclaimed.

“What? What is it?” she asked.

I looked at the small, brass padlock on the driveway next to my shoe.

“The freakin’ locking pin just broke,” I told her, “and the stupid lock just went down my pants leg.”

“Cheap crap,” she complained. “Do you have a spare?”

“A spare? No, I don’t have a spare – it’s brand new!”

“Well, then you better get your old one on right away,” she commanded.

And thus ended my four week trial of the new Birdlocked device.

A few months ago, the chastity community – such as it is – was all atwitter over the introduction of a new device (a rarity in itself ) that promised to be secure, comfortable, and affordable; qualities that are sought after by chastity enthusiasts like some kind of kinky Holy Grail. Like the Grail, however, the ideal chastity device is still elusive.

The Birdlocked at first glance looks like a puffy CB3000, being molded as a one-piece unit out of clear (well, translucent) silicone, which the manufacturers are trumpeting as “medical grade silicone.” I’m having a hard time finding what differentiates this from normal silicone, but I should point out that some dildos and other sex toys also claim to be made from this.

Anyone thinking that such a device would be too flimsy for normal use would be surprised at how durable it is. The silicone is about 1/8″ thick (3 – 4mm), and at least twice that in the section that holds the locking band. Some early models have ripped, but that seems to be from air bubbles in the molding, creating weakened areas. While I have no doubts that the devices can be torn, it’s not going to happen while you are wearing one.

Once you get past the “Hey, it’s all squishy” reaction when you open the box, you will realize that it has some heft to it; it’s almost as heavy as a CB6000, but the snug cuff ring will keep it from sliding down.

The cuff ring is attached to the body of the device, and is about 3/4″ wide. Those of you accustomed to the one-piece cuff rings on the CBxxxx line of devices will understand how to put in one testicle, then the other, and then finally smoosh your penis through, but even experienced kinksters will have a difficult time at first, simply because the wide cuff means that you have to hold onto whatever it is that you’ve smooshed through with one hand, smoosh other things through with the other hand, while bending the cage body out of the way with a third hand. I suggest loosening things up with a long, hot shower or bath first, because you’re going to need all the stretchiness you can get. Those of you who have only used the hinged cuff rings or the sectioned cuff rings on the 6k are in for a test.

I put mine on in the shower, and smooshed the wabbly bits through the cuff ring. It was easy to smear a little soap into the cage and squeeze everything else into place. The CBx000 devices depend on the hard plastic and some guide pins to keep wearers from bending the cage away from the cuff ring. The flexible Birdlock has a tether molded to the bottom front of the cage section that tethers to the bottom of the cuff ring by attaching to the locking strap. I pulled it forward and threaded the locking strap through the tether, and wrapped the strap around the cuff ring.

The cuff is flexible, and subject to stretching and bending, so the locking strap has a couple of different holes through which a small locking pin fits. The pin is smaller than the ones found in the 3k, and much shorter. The Birdlock company includes a small brass luggage padlock, about a third smaller than those that come with the 3k or 6k. The pics on the website show an Abus lock – a European company equivalent to Masterlock here in the US. That’s definitely not what I received – my brass minipadlock had such sharp edges that I scratched myself by accident. Before I put it near the expensive piece of plastic, I brought it down to the workshop to file off and buff out the edges and corners.

I’m hesitant to use the word “cheap”, because you probably don’t really need anything more substantial than the small luggage-style padlocks. Unfortunately, that was really the first thought that crossed my mind when I matched the lock to the pin, especially since the pin itself seemed pretty flimsy. However, since the pin only needs to keep the strap on the cuff ring, it shouldn’t be subject to much pressure or torque. Sadly, this is one more instance of the inattention to detail that one often sees from many fetish and BDSM supply shops. The CBx000 models rely on the pin to keep the sections together, so they need to be stronger.

The tether felt a little weird because I’m not used to wearing a ball splitter (it bisects the testicles), but being soft and squooshy, it wasn’t too uncomfortable. I put a little lotion around the potential chafing points after I dried off. Then I went off to a meeting, and was so comfortable that I forgot that I had it on.

Until it was time to pee.

I had counted on the inherent “stickiness” of the silicone to keep my penis in place, with the head positioned into the tapered end, and my urethra lined up with the small hole. However, after driving, walking, sitting, standing, climbing stairs, etc., somehow things got moved out of place, and the aforementioned inherent stickiness kept me from easily moving things back into place. Fortuantely, the bathroom was empty; I managed to grab a wad of toilet tissue in order to keep things from dripping all over my pants.

Lesson: smear some lube inside the cage in order to reposition yourself.

Mrs. Edge discovered it when we went to bed, and she spent a while feeling and fondling the new device, and decided that she had some small reservations, but overall we agreed it was worth keeping on for a while, so we decided to keep testing.

One of the difficulties in reviewing a product is trying to keep personal preferences from coloring the actual pros and cons, but in the case of something with such intimate use, it’s difficult to separate the opinions from the practicalities. For example, Mrs. Edge and I prefer to sleep in the nude, and she enjoys the feel of the device against her ass when we spoon. The Birdlock was a bit squishy, and to her, it didn’t feel substantial enough. In the past, I’ve heard the CBx000 devices referred to as “toys” by people who use the heavier steel devices, and I can now make a similar analogy. The squishiness certainly adds to the comfort, but the tradeoff is that if you are used to hard devices, it feels a bit… off.

The next morning I got up early to exercise, and discovered that some of my skin had swelled through the side vent holes. The holes are larger than those in the 3k, so it wasn’t painful, but it certainly looked odd. I reapplied some cream and exercised on the weight bench without a problem. I should point out that I don’t have a problem in the 3k, either, although the 3k does require some adjusting once in a while. I made coffee for Mrs. Edge and hopped into the shower.

The Birdlock is easy to clean, and the vent holes are just large enough to allow your pinkie finger to poke in and smear some soap around. I use a squeeze bottle to squirt warm water inside my 3k, and this trick worked just fine with the Birdlock. I was a little concerned about how well I would dry off inside the silicone tube, but as I discovered, it wasn’t an issue. Remembering my lesson, I smeared some lube inside the cage and got dressed for work.

Putting on my snug jeans is another test, and I was surprised to see that the Birdlocked actually had a little more of a bulge than my 3k. It wasn’t a weird looking bulge, like with the older 2k, but it was definitely noticeable, especially the round bulge made by the tip of the cage just past the seam of my crotch. You would think that the squishy cage tip would have conformed to the jeans, but what I discovered was that the much wider cuff was pulling everything further away from my body. The solid cuff rings are about 5/16″ wide, and the 6k ring is about 3/8″ wide, but the Birdlock is more than twice that width. The bulge was even more noticeable wearing my sweatpants, which meant that I had to remember to wear underwear under my sweats or gym shorts around the house; not only do we like to sleep in the nude, I prefer to go “commando” when possible. Other than the bulge, the Birdlock was comfortable under my jeans, and I wore them to work. During the next few days, I did find myself being aware of not leaning back in my chair when people were watching for fear that the bulge would show.

Again, though, peeing was a problem.

I’ve written how I modified the front slot of my 3k and my 6k to make it easier to line up my urethra in order to use the urinal. The Birdlock’s tapered head forced everything into place, and the little bit of lotion inside made it easy to just move things over a tad. But the tether kept me from pulling just the cage out of my pants; unlike in my loose dress pants the night before, I needed to maneuver my entire package out of my pants in order to pee. I eventually figured out the trick (part of which was to not wear the snug jeans).

Having been accustomed to the hard cuff rings, the flexy cuff of the Birdlock was a pleasure. I wasn’t as bothered by the extra pulling that some men have reported, although I did make the mistake of shaving right before I put it on; the wide cuff pressed on the hairs as they grew, making me itch fiercely for most of the week – even lubing up a few times a day wasn’t enough to relieve the itching. The second weekend had pleasant weather, and I found that I could easily work outside, bending, stretching, and doing yardwork with no appreciable loss of mobility, or need to adjust the device. I even dusted off the bike and went for a quick ride. And this is where the Birdlock shines: I didn’t have to adjust myself, nothing chafed, and my testicles didn’t get caught in any unforgotten corners of the cage. I rode several miles at a good clip on my road bike, the one with the shifters on the frame, so I was constantly bending over and pressing against the saddle (something which I have to be careful about in my 3k) and barely noticed that I was wearing a device.

And so it went for a couple of weeks. I didn’t have any real complaints except for the slightly more prominent bulge, and by the end of the week, even the itching was better as the hair grew back in under the ring. I found cleaning to be easy, especially if I used a squirt bottle to flush out the inside. I’ve long since learned to use lotion instead of baby oil on these devices because it’s much easier to clean. In two straight weeks locked up I didn’t have any hygiene issues, not did I develop any chafing or sore spots.

Two weeks, and then it was time for some play.

Blowing the chastity stereotype out of the water, Mrs. Edge prefers intercourse to oral, so we use a strap-on when I’m locked up. We have a nice leather one from Stormy Leather, and we have acquired a couple of very lifelike dildos from Blowfish – a little bit too lifelike at times, I think. I slipped on the harness, and tried it out. It fit well, and I think I was able to wear the dlido slightly lower on my hips than with the 3k, but I did not measure it or compare them side-by-side. Lower on the hips, of course, means more natural movements for me., which translates into a more natural feel for her.

As much as we like to test things out objectively here at Edge of Vanilla Labs, we haven’t figured out a statistically valid test for Mrs. Edge’s orgasms. Essentially, she lies there as I whisper dirty things in her ear and hold her closely, all the while using my hips for slow, deep thrusts. Mrs. Edge has the orgasmic capacity of a Chicago voter: she comes early and often. When she starts breathing heavily and digging her nails into my ass, though, I know it’s particularly good. Oddly enough, though, there was no fingernail digging.

Later, when discussing how it felt, she complained that she did not feel the cage press against her ass as it does when I’m wearing the 3k. Again, this is one of those very subjective issues – Mrs. Edge gets very turned on by the feel of the hard plastic cage against her; it lets her know that I’m still locked up. The Birdlocked flexed just a little too much for her tastes, which she found to be less arousing. Yes, she knows I’m wearing the cage, but the lack of tactile feedback cut things back a notch for her. It’s not a deal-breaker for her, and if we hadn’t already been used to the 3k and 6k, then it might not have even been noticeable, but it’s one of those variables that we need to factor in.

On impulse, she decided that she wanted to compare the “other cock” to the one in the cage. She opened the lock and we undid the locking band and tether, and I wriggled the silicone cage off. The smell was minimal (I rinse it at least twice a day), and as I washed off, I spun the cuff around so that the cage was dangling underneath, as Mrs. Edge wanted me to leave it on. While it was snug, it was uncomfortable as a cock ring, probably because it was too wide. But we managed to make do, and the cuff was just snug enough to keep me hard, even though I could feel it flexing a bit. After a few minutes, Mrs Edge was satisfied, and we (after a few more minutes, a cold washcloth, and a lot of lube) were able to wrangle the cage back on.

We wouldn’t be Edge of Vanilla Labs if we didn’t make some kind of modification to a device. Later in the week, I removed the cage for a few days and covered up the two round vent holes at either side in the center of the device. My skin was constantly swelling out of the sides, and while it was never as painful as it had been with the 3k or 6k, it was still a bit irritating. I cleaned the cage thoroughly with soap and then again with alcohol, and placed tape along the inside of the cage (no small feat – the silicone seems resistant to the stickum ), then smeared clear silicone caulking into the hole and around the outside. After giving it a few days to set, the cage wen t back on. I was concerned that closing the vent holes might affect the cage because the silicone tends to cling to me, but I couldn’t tell any difference – except, of course, that my skin didn’t swell out of the sides anymore.

I swapped back and forth between the Birdlock and the 6k for a few days until I was sure that the silicone would hold, and wouldn’t harm the cage, and by the time Mrs. Edge left for a week to visit family, I had been back in the Birdlock for another week. The rest of the week was uneventful; I exercised a lot, rode my bike, mowed the lawn, went to meetings, and tried to wear pants that wouldn’t show up the bulge too much. By the end of the fourth week (a few nights before she was to come home) I thought that things were holding up just fine, so I was rather surprised – and irritated – to have been derailed by crack in the locking pin. I think it might have happened during a bike sprint, but I have no way of knowing. It’s possible that the lock simply got caught wrong in my underwear and bent the pin back when I was lifting something. So, later that night, I was back in my 6k in which I spent the next few days waiting for Mrs. Edge. Of course, I split the seam on that a few days after she got back, but that’s another story.

At this point in any other review, I’d be giving the product a “Thumbs up” or something equally inane. Unfortunately, it’s not quite so easy with the Birdlock. I tend to rate chastity devices on three main points: Comfort, Convenience, and Security. Overall, we liked the device: it’s comfortable – I barely knew that I had it on most of the time, and I didn’t have to keep adjusting it while biking and exercising. I found it to be fairly easy to clean and maintain, and in four weeks I wasn’t able to pull out of it.

But . . .

I didn’t care for the itchiness from having my hair grow back under the wide cuff ring. I have no idea what it would be like otherwise, since I generally shave or trim regularly. The bulge was larger than I would have expected; we had hoped for a device that would be convenient to wear under swim trunks or snug bicycle shorts; the 3k and 6k show up a bit more than I’d like, and the Birdlock disappointingly more so. And just the fact that it shows up a bit more in regular pants makes this a second choice for our own regular usage. I don’t have any complaints about the security, either, except that by the middle of the fourth week, I was able to give myself some stimulation by continually squeezing the soft cage. It took a while, and it wasn’t worth moaning over, but I was able to bring myself to a reasonably satisfying orgasm (Ssssh! This is just between you and me, okay? Don’t tell Mrs. Edge.). That’s minus quite a few points on the Security scale.

As to the more subjective points, both Mrs. Edge and I had some misgivings about the flexy silicone. We decided that we both like the hard plastic of the CB3000 and CB6000; compared to them, the Birdlocked felt a bit more like a toy, or not for “serious” play. As mentioned earlier, for years I’ve been hearing that owners of the expensive steel belts dislike the plastic devices for much the same reason. The Birdlock had too much give for us when spooning in bed at night, and as mentioned before she couldn’t feel it enough during sex. And as to the construction of the device, while I’m convinced that it will not fall apart under normal use, I was disappointed by the rather cheap feel and flimsiness of the plastic locking pin. Even the plastic strap that goes around the cuff ring was stretching by the time I had to remove it. And again, the sharp corners on the cheap luggage lock were inexcusable. I’m fortunate to be handy with tools in order to repair and modify what I need; most people, though, are not, and should not have to do so in order to use a device for the purpose which it is sold. The CBx000 devices ship with a full set of rings and a decent Masterlock. There’s no reason that the Birdlock can’t ship with an extra locking pin and locking strap.

All in all, I would recommend the Birdlock for newbie wearers and for people just experimenting with chastity and orgasm denial, but for those who already own a 3k or 6k, I’d suggest that unless your device gives you some serious comfort issues, then you probably don’t have anything to gain by adding the Birdlock to your collection. It’s a great concept, but it needs some re-thinking and fine tuning before it replaces the more widely known devices already on the market.

Q: Why don’t Baptists have sex standing up? A: It might lead to dancing.

Oddly, Keven Bacon has nothing to do with this.

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From the Dayton Daily News:

Ohio Christian school tells student to skip prom

The Associated Press
Updated 12:11 PM
Friday, May 8, 2009

FINDLAY, Ohio — A student at a fundamentalist Baptist school that forbids dancing, rock music, hand-holding and kissing will be suspended if he takes his girlfriend to her public high school prom, his principal said.

Despite the warning, 17-year-old Tyler Frost, who has never been to a dance before, said he plans to attend Findlay High School’s prom Saturday.

Frost, a senior at Heritage Christian School in northwest Ohio, agreed to the school’s rules when he signed a statement of cooperation at the beginning of the year, principal Tim England said.

The teen, who is scheduled to receive his diploma May 24, would be suspended from classes and receive an “incomplete” on remaining assignments, England said. Frost also would not be permitted to attend graduation but would get a diploma once he completes final exams. If Frost is involved with alcohol or sex at the prom, he will be expelled, England said.

Frost’s stepfather Stephan Johnson said the school’s rules should not apply outside the classroom.

“He deserves to wear that cap and gown,” Johnson said.

Frost said he thought he had handled the situation properly. Findlay requires students from other schools attending the prom to get a signature from their principal, which Frost did.

“I expected a short lecture about making the right decisions and not doing something stupid,” Frost said. “I thought I would get his signature and that would be the end.”

England acknowledged signing the form but warned Frost there would be consequences if he attended the dance. England then took the issue to a school committee made up of church members, who decided to threaten Frost with suspension.

“In life, we constantly make decisions whether we are going to please self or please God. (Frost) chose one path, and the school committee chose the other,” England said.

The handbook for the 84-student Christian school says rock music “is part of the counterculture which seeks to implant seeds of rebellion in young people’s hearts and minds.”

England said Frost’s family should not be surprised by the school’s position.

“For the parents to claim any injustice regarding this issue is at best forgetful and at worst disingenuous,” he said. “It is our hope that the student and his parents will abide by the policies they have already agreed to.”

The principal at Findlay High School, whose graduates include Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, said he respects, but does not agree with, Heritage Christian School’s view of prom.

“I don’t see (dancing and rock music) as immoral acts,” Craig Kupferberg said.

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Information from: The Courier, http://www.thecourier.com

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“In life, we constantly make decisions whether we are going to please self or please God.”
It must be nice to have no doubts that you actually are on a mission from God.

News item: Man begs doctors to undo penis enlargement surgery

I’m sure that there is a lesson in all this. I just can’t quite figure out how to put this into words.

From the English version of Mosnews.com:

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Man begs doctors to undo penis enlargement surgery

4 May, 02:23 PM

Just one month after undergoing a penis enlargement surgery, a patient of a Moscow plastic surgery clinic has asked the doctors to restore the original size of his penis.

In February the 40-years-old man, identified as Konstantin F., came to the clinic complaining he was too small, Life.ru website reports Monday.

The man wanted to add an extra two-thirds to his penis and get 25 cm (9.8 inches) instead of his 15 cm (5.9 inches).

The doctors tried to persuade the patient that his penis was ideally sized, warned that he may be unhappy with the results of the surgery, and even showed him a life-sized replica of a 25-cm male organ. But the man stood his ground and demanded the operation.

The surgery was completed in two sessions, and happy Konstantin returned home almost twice as large as he used to be. But in just one month he was back at the clinic again, this time asking to undo the enlargement.

“He said no woman wants to be with him anymore,” Life.ru quoted one of the doctors as saying.

“He came here several times, begged us for new surgery, swore he would never be so stupid again.”

However it will take six to eight months before a second surgery can be performed.

“If there was a surgery to enlarge brains, we would offer him a free trial,” the doctor said.

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I’m a bit surprised that nobody is posting the “before” and “after” pictures.

Chastity Captions

Okay, I knew about lolcats and I’ve seen other examples of pictures that have had captions added in order to create a humorous mini-scene. But I was unprepared for the sheer number of websites and online groups that exist in order to trade and show off captioned pics of a more sexual nature.

I got the idea to hunt around for them after I saw some of the work by ptathuk, who recently set up a blog to showcase his art: Chastity Fantasies of an Obsessive Compulsive. ptathuk, being a fan of EoV, even dedicated a picture to me, having been inspired by something I’d written a couple of years ago. Since then, I found myself looking forward to the several pics a week he would put up, as he seems to have a good sense of balance with his subjects. Focusing on captions about chastity and orgasm denial themes, he features women who range from fetish models to ordinary, from stick thin to Reubenesque.

Anyway, I went hunting for more, and ran across a dozen websites and even more web groups. Amazingly, some people actually pay money, as if they were subscribing to a porn site. I’m not sure why, but I have a theory that well-done caps have the appeal of a short story, the ability to spark the imagination, and give just a little bit of tantalizing visual appeal.

Unfortunately, most of what I have found is not particularly well done.

While a lot of the cap enthusiasts manage to find pics of attractive women in various stages of dress, a large number of caps are ruined by horrible spelling, grammar, and punctuation ( They are also ruined by poor choices of scenarios, but I’ll concede that this is only a personal preference on my part). Yes, go ahead and sneer at me, but running across a typo in a 2, 500 word or even a 500 word article is forgivable. But a 25 or 50 caption in 18 point bold type should be perfect: no misspelled words, clear grammar, proper capitalization, and – please excuse a pet peeve of mine – the correct form of “your” or “you’re”, “there” or “they’re”, and “its” or “it’s.” And don’t even get me started on using text-speak. “U,” and “ur” for “you” and “you’re” are fine when you’re texting or IMing, but they look ridiculous in grown-up written conversation.

I mean, for cryin’ out loud, guys, ignoring that adults should know how to use the correct spelling of a word, how hard is it to compose in a text window and use spell check?

In giving some thought as to why the bad cops bothered me so much, I think it’s because when you look at these pictures, you are transported – for a short time – into a miniature fantasy world, where the perfect woman is playing out your ideal fantasy, your chastity device is truly inescapable (and comfortable), and the other sexual situations present no obstacles. To me, running across glaring errors jars me out of that fantasy back into the real world, in much the way that an annoyingly buzzing alarm clock jars you out of that nice dream and reminds you that you have to put in yet another day in the quarry.

I have to take a moment to mention that from what I have seen, the majority men creating these pictures seem to subscribe to the “cruel, cuckolding dominatrix” school, as most of the pics I’ve seen tend to be the sneering mistress with captions such as “Ive got u in the best belt. Ur never gonna cum again, chasty!” or “ur little dickie is to small too satisfy me anyway so we might as well lock it up PERMENTLY!” or “oh stop whining or ill soder the lock shut. (giggle) now get over hear and fluff my luver so he can give me the orgasims that u cant with ur little dickie.” I’m not complaining, mind you, since it’s not like I’ve commissioned anybody to do some for me, but seeing this over and over does get tiresome, and as I’ve mentioned before, a vanilla-ish partner who might happen upon such pictures is going to get a very skewed perspective and likely be scared off.

One of the things that I like about ptathuk’s caps is that he tends to keep them simple and gentle. They tend to be mainly about people who are just starting to get involved in chastity and orgasm denial, and many of them seem to take place at around the time when one partner (generally him) has proposed the idea; the caption is her reaction to his suggestion, and (because this is fantasy, remember?) generally shows her to be excited at the prospect. Interestingly, several of them feature women (ptathuk only seems to do straight caps) who have already been involved in chastity play, and who suggest ways to push the boundaries, and then ask if he will be more excited by the prospect.  I found that to be a nice touch, as it puts a more real-life aspect on the situation, making the mini-fantasy more believable.

I couldn’t resist trying my hand at a few of these. I’ve discovered that there are several online programs that will import a picture and allow you to insert text into it – even a picture that is elsewhere on the web. I’ve also discovered that captioning pictures is a huge, time-wasting pain in the ass, so I’m happy to let others do the work.

Modifying your security settings: The CB3000 & 6000

As you can tell from the title, this is going to be one of the more technically oriented posts, so if you aren’t interested in the geekier aspects of chastity devices, then I suggest that you toddle off to look at my HNTs.

The CB-2ooo has been around since the mid to late 1990s; the 2k was not the first inexpensive male chastity device, but it soon became one of the first widely marketed, mass-produced models. The original versions were built from machined and glued acrylic pieces, but as the demand grew, AL Enterprises invested the money to have the sections molded of polycarbonate plastic. Easy to clean, and not too finicky to modify, the 2k went from a novelty to a full time business.

The success of the 2k allowed AL Enterprises to invest money in a more complex design: The Curve. While it did not gain the wide following of the previous version, it paved the way for an even more complex design in the CB3000. The 3k, perhaps because of the outside shape, took the “trapped ball” style devices out of the “adult novelty” section and into a variety of other categories. Over the last few years, I’ve seen references to the 3k pop up on a wide range of websites. Yes, most of them are of the “WTF is this for?” genre, but just the fact that other people comment on those items shows that they are becoming, if not more popular, at least not so unusual.

Last year’s introduction of the CB6000 was more evolutionary than revolutionary, but the trimmed, sleeker shape seems to be at least as popular than the previous model. Personally, I’m disappointed that the new model isn’t made to be interchangeable on the cuff rings with the previous versions, but anyone with some tools and a bit of creativity can figure out how to work something out. After having worn both devices for some length of time, I find that I prefer the 3k, but it’s a close call.

The success of the CBx000 line can be shown by the various group discussions, the large number of hints and tips about wearing the devices available around the web, and in number of after-market add-ons that have sprung up over the last few years. It speaks volumes, however, that the most popular discussions (and most common add-ons) have to do with enhancing either the comfort or the security of the devices.

Some users of the original 2k noted that with some lube and a few minutes, they could wriggle their penis out the back of the cuff ring. The device would still be attached to their bodies, held on by the thin space between the cuff ring and the cage (hence the moniker “trapped ball” device), it became clear that the device, while preventing intercourse, could still allow one to masturbate. While this isn’t a concern with some people – chastity being, of course, about fidelity within a relationship – those interested in exploring orgasm control, either with regard to a personal sacrifice, or in a BDSM context, have been disappointed. The 3k and 6k, unfortunately, haven’t seen many improvements in that regard, at least, not if the reports of the various web boards and email lists are any indication. While the devices have improved in comfort and wearability, a lot still depends upon the personal anatomy of the wearer.

CB6000 Mods

This problem is not limited to the CBx000 line, by any means; I’ve seen users of various other devices with similar complaints. Some men who are able to pull out of one device report it to be impossible in others. Some other men report that they can pull out of all of them. The problem stems from the fact that some men can compress their squashy bits more than others. The 3k, though, seems to have more options for security than the other devices by AL Enterprise, and the various other devices manufactured – especially the ones made from stainless steel – don’t really have any. If you can pull out of device, unless you have a genital piercing, preferably a PA (Prince Albert), then for the most part your device is more symbolic than actual.

Security Mods

I’ve mentioned elsewhere that I have needed to modify both the CB3000 and the CB6000, both with some degree of success. A while back, I had the idea that I could anchor myself in the 6k with an O-ring attached to an elastic (which would provide some slack to accommodate the natural movement during the course of the day). It worked really well – for about three days, when, while cleaning the inside with a cotton swab, I discovered that I could ease the O-ring off, and later, ease back into it. So much for my simple idea.

Fortunately, there are more practical security add-ons for the CBxxxx line of devices. The most well known are probably those sold at www.keptforher.com, and are known as the KSD, or “Keepsake Device” line. The G2 is essentially a molded plastic reducing bushing; it slips into the inside of the CB2000 or CB3000, and provides a smaller opening – the idea being that once squished into it, it would be very difficult to wriggle out of the back. This seems to work for a lot of men, although there are some issues reported. The snug fit can sometimes be too snug for those men who are “growers,” causing the blood to be trapped in the penis, making it swollen or difficult to remove. But the biggest issue is that some men are simply too flexible and squishy to be anchored by such devices.

The next design by the Keptforher folks is actually a complete change on the “make it snugger” school of design that we tend to see for chastity device add-ons. Thinking “outside the tube”, they have a plastic insert that looks like the top half of a bushing , with a tongue extending an inch or so into the tube. While designed with the 6k in mind, on a 3k it would cover the top vent holes (which pretty much serve no other purpose than to allow you to swell up through them like little skin balloons).

The tongue tapers a little bit, with the end terminating in a small flange that nestles in the ridge behind the head of your penis. The flange does two things: it helps to keep your penis in pretty much the same position inside the tube during the course of the day, and while there are no sharp edges, it does create a blockage for the loose skin, should you be tempted to try to pull your penis backwards. It’s quite simple, and when you see it working it makes you wonder why nobody had thought of it sooner.

Over the last – wow, has it been ten years? – that we’ve been experimenting with chastity and OD at the Edge of Vanilla Labs, there has always been a tug of war between the comfort and convenience, and the security of the several devices that we’ve tried. The ability for a lot of men to pull out the back is, I think, one of the reasons that the AL/CBxxxx devices are often considered to be “toys” or not worthy of serious consideration. I think that the latest G3 might work well enough for the majority of users to satisfy both the comfort and security concerns. I wore a G3 in my slightly modified 3k for about six weeks straight, and did not have any problems with fit or function.

Why such a long post on this? First, to provide a little background, because – believe it or not – chastity devices are still a pretty new fetish, and based on the conversations that I see in the various groups, people seem to be discovering them every week. However, I also wanted to lay out some technical groundwork before I started my review of a similar device, because that will take an entire post in itself.

HNT: Push it

Don’t mind me – mornings are the best time for me to work out. I’m just trying to get in a few pushups before the rest of the household wakes up.

23... 24... 25... 26...

Hope I didn’t disturb anyone.

Join in the HNT fad. Check out the guidelines at Osbasso’s place!